Muse...

Those beats so clamored,
they pound in her head,
yet for once she stands,
devoid song.

They turn into rhythm
then twist brazenly away
so lyrically blessed
pristine.

And the damsel in distress
starts to digress
from the pain.
Addled and
trapped in its web
that twists
and forces her to sway

Swinging
with the world glued to the tips
of her fingers
glistening,
in the sun
for a second
till she broke
and damned it to shadows
like her being.

Rising and falling
in perfect points and arcs
tired yet continuing
cause this hate drum
never stops.

And slowly as her thoughts,
burn to haze
with the world too heavy to swing
she brushes it off
One last time
and collapses to the floor
cold granite
smooth and endless
like an ocean of black.

I guess this is what death feels like
with her body arched
and chest raised
as it drew all the hatred from her soul
sucked her in
and spat her out
to fall to the side
eyes wide open
staring.

Slain, in the sound of the wind
and all that surrounded
heaving,
gasping,
like
she was free
to suffocate.

One last time
Just one last time.


It’s all over now.

Breathe.




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Shraddha

Sasha...

What is this world,
if I stopped counting seconds
to when I could see your face,
to see your smile,
as each quarter of your teeth came into focus
and dissapeared.

What is this world when not happy,
as the air's no longer tickled,
by the taste of your lips,
and ether found its meaning.

And while the river falls somewhere in the distance,
I can hear its lost direction,
like it wouldnt know which way up or down,
& whoever told it left from right.

And this world was left empty,
like you drew the fizz from a bottle of coke,
shook it and all you had left
was sugar and water,
and it still didnt taste that sweet.

Close my eyes, trying to forget,
the days that caught me in bright sunrise,
forget, that light ever walked this earth,
when opened, im found staring into the mirror of today.

Dissolved in the shambles you've turned this house to,
like your power that made was the same that destroyed.

And I swear I find something evil, and sinister in her eyes,
the ones that stare back,
I see that smile emerge everytime,
you say you've met no one worth meeting.
like a possessed only child, happy lonely,
cause she has no need to share.

I can watch her eyes turn green in brightest envy,
as though loathing in defeat.
Everytime they find you happy in the presence of someone else.
Everytime someone seems beautiful.

I can feel her eyes go black in helplessness
like it was blank without a filter,
and no gaurd, with nothing to protect,
when this reflection finds a vanishing you.

And I cry for seconds now dead,
for the seconds I felt your arm wrap around mine.
and we'd walk not knowing,
where the road led us or whom to.
But theyd always lead us home.
Cause home was always you.

What is this world and all its stories,
when the same page doesnt contain me and you?
Who is my God here in Kindness and power,
when he knows not,
who am I, and who are you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

No amount of liquid or smoke would ever let me forget.
could you find me a new pill to pop?
to soothe the pain.
I cannot take this anymore.
I Love you.

~ Shraddha

When No Clouds Line The Horizon

No signs of rain, yet still he waits,
Eyes upturned, wishing a pouring heaven.
Yet nothing his way does flow besides,
The wind from a desert once glen.

In his eyes he has seen the Ocean,
But feet never left his fallow land.
Dying is the unborn, as pregnant Earth,
Is parched as thirsty sand.

If tears could quench his thirsty Land,
The Rivers would, an Ocean be made.
But look what angry sun has wrought,
For tears have dried unmade.

He stands over the roots of,
A Tree ancient and knotted.
As he looks away and over the forest vale,
Where the dusky woods have rotted.

Entranced he moves, towards salvation,
When a buzzing awakens afar.
He turns to see the ague of grain,
For their due, have come from far.

With sad eyes over the Locusts wild,
And lips cracked into a last grin.
Over flung he, the catcher of Rye,
Into the blighted fen within.

The Wind...

Sinking into ripples like the winters Breeze,
cold light that fades, to oblivion like me,
you shall never grace, your dead storm with my sound,
as you rise in new ashes, my nexus drowns.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


~ Shraddha

Miser's Attention...

In empty words that broke and fell,
like water running up a paper mill,
you shattered my body, like porcelain bones,
scoffed and frowned and swallowed me whole.

And the distaste, so meaningless, I left in your mouth,
evident, in the apathy, when you drooled me out.
And when i wriggled lifelessly and struggled to breathe,
your lips bid me luck, eyes wouldnt care to see.

Turn to magic, your fingers, and everythings gold.
But when they flinched in disgust, they cast me in stone.
Yet i follow like a fool dancing in your light,
as you guide me into darkness, to lose me this night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~ Shraddha

Footsteps on cobblestone

as i sit for another day
slowly time will take her away
as i sip for another night
slowly the pain will subside
with tears gleaming in the morning sun
and the wind kissing my broken smile
moved away they all just did
making way for the perfect crime

as i walk down the empty street
my heart beats a different beat
amidst strangers i found a home
between time and footsteps on cobblestone

no longer do i need to run
no longer do i have to hide
free myself i can, of whats left inside
search deeper i can, of what remains us

all the stares make no sense
never did i have a winning smile
all the fear makes no sense
never did i have a cruel smile
temples i build within
with light that never dims
love i hold deep within
with time i become it

as i walk down the busy street
my heart beats a different beat
amidst myself i found a home
between silence and footsteps on cobblestone


Hmmm okay i havent been writing for a long time and this poem or whatever might seem stupid.. Dunno what made me write it or visit this blog after such a long time but am happy to be posting again :) Looking forward to comments from the people i know and love from our time in gothic community and other new readers as well..

Curiosity Killed The Damn Cat...

I can feel it in the wind,
And your breath on my face
The season turning to dust
And my soul to tar.

The days pass by and I spin,
Like a lonely stranger,
Stripped...and just realizing
He had clothes on.
Wishing he could shoot the birds in the trees
And dress in feathers
Yet finding only bark to his disposal.

And in this strange meander he finds
Four walls containing you,
Walks in as you flash that heavenly smile
A sense of overwhelming calm that somehow suddenly
And yet
Slowly turns to purgatory
Revealing my sins and flaws and counting so many
That I lose track of the fact
I may have a price attached to my name
Cause even tar sells.

Tar, Hot molten tar
That's spreading leaking out like sheer waste.
And over strong unusually cold eyes
I settle
Waiting for forgiveness
For belonging
For your eyes to once stare in my direction
Devoid of the disgust that burns my skin, like everyday.

Reflections in the water trying to turn mud to make up
Wishing seduction would make me the apple of your eye
Raped and torn in a bare glance, You,
is it you who makes me ugly?

Wondering in few silent moments when I can,
If this were your shrine,
Enveloped in bouts of masochism that forces me
To lay here to be whipped.

Are you just as fickle as I am?
Another stranger holding another
Till time passes by
And a better comes along...

And as our hearts grow older
I find yours turning to soft wax
And me,In rushes, like a child, jumping in,
Only to find my feet stuck in a candle,
And body Ready to be lit.
Dicey as you play hot and cold and I sink further in
Curiosity murdering the cat so helpless
It couldn't find out who you were,
If I could only touch your face just once,
And have your eyes only glance at me
An attention so undivided we'd be lost
In a bowl of truth
A spectrum where they couldn't lie
If only you wouldnt bite and turn me shy
Of asking questions.

Slowly the world turned, she never knew
ButThe end drew nearer,and time kept it's date.
The leaves outside the window had cleared
And the flood had paved a grave.
I dragged my feet along to his chamber
Courage to try cause I'd die anyway,
And as I touched his face
Not a thing occurred
His eyes seemed blank
And His life hollow
And in that spectrum of truth no questions were asked
And none answered...
Feeling tortured no more I slipped
Free and yet soaked in apathy towards anything that ever existed.
In my daze
I could hear the water knocking
What a shame to be so dispassionate at my last minute,
head hung,
I waited for the flood to take me
And as eyes opened I could only see the trees outside the window
With the leaves shed on the ground
And a tiny stone said " he who once lived, now lays here"

And as if
For the first time
In so long I could hear the forest speak
As though his voice had drowned out the world
As Though the pain was the greatest joy
He could've granted me...
And in the maddening hustle of the trees and the wind
That disturbed his quiet grave
all I could hear them say was
"we only blame you"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Perhaps I was never ugly,
Maybe my doubts killed the one man who understood me true,
Perhaps this shrine was built for me,
Or perhaps you were ugly too.

~ Shraddha
Love yall all.. How are you?